Lovely Hotel

Yokosuka is to Tokyo as New Jersey is to Manhattan. Imagine all the bad haircuts and two seasons out-of-date styles crammed into one military city dominated by one liter sodas sold at the American military base McDonald's branch. Far, far down in my blog is a ridiculous picture of the most ferocious mullet I have ever laid eyes upon. It defines business-in-the-front, party-in-the-back.

(Read about it on English Wiki or Japanese Wiki.)

I was out in Yokosuka under the guise of watching fireworks. In truth, I was there to ensure my style was at least three months ahead of all locals. Hairstyles included. The gigantic American military base is opened to the public once or twice a year. This day was to allow for better viewing of the hanabi (fireworks).

Upon entering the base, I was stopped and questioned by a Japanese guard in halting English. "May I see some identification, sir?" Startled, I rummaged through my bag to find my passport. Without even realizing it, I spoke in, albeit baby, Japanese to the guard. "One moment." (Chotto matte.) "Are you military?" "No."

Once inside the main gates, I was instantly transported back to the United States. Everywhere, military mothers could be seen with haircuts last seen when Kim Zmeskal was still an Olympic gold hopeful. (Call it the "high pressure parent" haircut -- a close relative to the Church Lady style.) Their husbands could be seen wearing shockingly white cross trainers with knee-length shorts and three-button polos. And one liter sodas were featured at the local McDonald's branch. (Japanese children were using both hands.)

In the grilling section... wait, all the food was grilled, except the plethora of American fast food chains... chicken legs were sold to Japanese tourists that were literally larger than the receiving arms. The shoulder was the size of a softball. Instead of selling slices of pizza, they only sold entire pies. Groups of Japanese tourists failed to finish these pies.

What about this entry's picture? Prior to the base entrance, there is a prominent love hotel featuring a reproduction Statue of Liberty. Inquiring, I was told it is a trademark of this chain of love hotels. Lovely.